Our friend Mr. Pierce once again demonstrates the fine art of being royally pissed off and entertaining all at the same time.
Did it escape everyone’s attention that the president of the United States was both delusional and despicable this week? It is a considerable parlay, even by his standards. He stood up at a press conference and told David Gregory that only he, the mighty C-Plus Augustus, and his pet war are standing between Gregory’s children and a horrible death. I can tell you conclusively that, if a major-league manager stood up in his post-game presser and said anything that weird and indecent, the media paid to cover the team wouldn’t stop talking about it for a month and a half. A while back, Ozzie Guillen had some fascinating things to say on several occasions regarding gay people, and those comments haven’t just followed him, they have come to define his public persona. (Note to Jack Shafer — this may be why Al Gore ignored sports coverage in his critique of the media’s sad fascination with shiny baubles. Sports journalists do the job they way it’s supposed to be done. Presented with manifest incompetence on the part of a player at the job he has been hired to do, it doesn’t take a sports columnist seven years to feel safe enough to call the player a f**k-up.) The president ran off at the mouth in such a fashion as to call into question how closely he’s dancing with reality these days, and it just sort of filters into the news and is diluted and gone within 24 hours.
Look, sport. I’ll take care of my kids. One of the ways I’ll do it is to make sure that you and your creepazoid vice-president don’t send them off to be killed on the basis of lies, trickeration, and the fact that you never flattened Daddy on the front lawn that night you were sockless. Another of the ways I’ll do it is to make sure they fight as hard as they can to recapture the constitutional rights — and the culture of civil liberties — to which they are entitled by nature and by nature’s god, to make sure they never again have to live under a government staffed by legacy idiots and the products of fourth-rate right-wing diploma mills. The last way I’ll do it is to make sure they recognize and appreciate those things about this country that actually are worth fighting for — most of which you wouldn’t recognize if they fell off a shelf onto your head. Protect my kids? Ace, I wouldn’t hire you to mow my lawn.